Aries: A bright Sun gives you the insight to see your partner’s true feelings, but not enough to understand what caused them. You probably don’t want to know anyway.

Taurus: You’ll come up with a romance novel plot based on things you wish had happened to you.

Gemini: You’ll think of a great new excuse to rationalize your abusive behavior.

Cancer: Your partner will do something that gives you a major ick.

Leo: Your charm, wit, and aura will be even more attractive this week. But don’t worry, you’ll have the strength to remain loyal.

Virgo: The harder you try to please others, the more repulsed they will be.

Libra: Your partner will be two minutes late on Wednesday. That’s all. Libras don’t have that much going on in their lives.

Scorpio: You’ll think about ways to do good for your partner, none of which involve being loyal or kind.

Sagittarius: You’ll try to impress your partner with a magic trick that makes you look like a total dork.

Capricorn: You’ll come off slightly less robotic and standoffish during the weekend.

Aquarius: Your partner will try to surprise you, but the surprise will be so obvious that you’ll be disappointed once you realize that that’s it.

Pisces: Your partner will mistake your underdeveloped intellect for youthful naivety and innocence this week.

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